Tiger: The New Cheatah

Couldn’t Tiger Woods have been with women who closed both their legs and their mouths? Woods can’t buy his privacy even if he is on his yacht that he laid out (snicker, childish, but what the hell) $20 million for and named Privacy. He has too many accomplices who are talking and one claims to even have pictures of his putter…er, I mean his penis.

I went to a party last weekend and Tiger's name crept into a heated argument. For all that some of his alleged mistresses say about him being a great lover and having a great package, he really is hotter than anyone in the news right now. And at this party, there was a division amongst the males and females about his hotness.

While he can afford the best that money can buy why mess with call girls? He should have learned from ex-Governor Eliot Spitzer who paid a whopping $4,300 in cash being Client #9 that you can’t shut 'em up especially when you're caught. So don’t you think Woods knew on some level what he was doing and the risk he was running?

Now I do believe that he is one very smart guy. Not only is he a talented golfer, he succeeded in his career because of his support system, mentors, and team of financial and marketing advisors. He made his name a brand earning a reported 100 million dollars a year just from endorsements alone.

He is a career perfectionist: playing his game the best way possible. He put into years of continuous practice; a strategy of preplanning his shots and swings. Woods made it his business to know the terrain of each golf course: the lay (I just can't stop!)\ of the land, so to speak.

I find it hard to believe he would be so naïve as to think that picking women (often looking remarkably like his wife) and having relationships, some long-term, with waitresses and call girls couldn’t possibly hurt him and his family one day. Would Tiger use his putter when he needs his driver instead? I don’t think so. Instead Woods kept using his woody.

Being one of the most highly respected sport stars, by his silence Tiger Woods invited the media to re-brand him as Tiger: The Lying King, and Tiger: the Cheatah. And while some more sponsors drop him, others might pop up like Trojan and Ambien, not to mention certain hotel chains.

So after voicing all of this at the party, the other women came down hard on me saying that I should not be shocked to hear about Tiger’s “transgressions”. He’s a man. Men cheat if they can. He was hiding behind a squeaky image fabricated and protected for years before Tiger’s own wife took a stand. And if the soon-to-be ex-Mrs.Woods hadn't learned about his secret life he’d still be practicing his off-season sport.

Well the men did not argue about that point. (Men tend to protect each other that way I’ve found.) All that they contributed was their own debate over which joke made being Tiger Woods more laughable. Tiger: Got in more holes than one or Tiger: The man who overused his woody. There was only one thing that they did agree on after discussing his earnings and girlie escapades. They wished that they could actually be Tiger Woods—six months ago!

By Paige_Me