Being in relationships in your 20s is a completely unique experience: you already know some things, you’re completely clueless about other things…and some things that you think you’ve got all figured out will turn out to be things that you change your mind about over and over again.
Everything is amorphous and amorous…and every time you fall in love, it’s better than the last. And at this precious time, doing so has never been easier. Plus, you’re still young enough that the memory of being sexually-constrained by living in your parents' house is close enough that you really, really enjoy having your own place. And I’m convinced that appreciation makes sex even hotter.
But being a romantic explorer during this decade isn’t the easiest piece of pie to slice. Read on for the best and worst things about 20-something relationships and life:
Best: You think every relationship is “The One”
It’s such a magical feeling: every new relationship immediately is an improvement upon the last and when you’re in your 20s and riding high on that great wave of self-knowledge, you truly believe with every new romance that you couldn’t possibly get it more right than you have this time.
Worst: You think every relationship is “The One”
The downside? You haven’t been through enough amazing, feels-so-perfect relationship and had been them fail. So when they do, it’s like your world is falling to pieces…and that’s not even being overly dramatic.
When you so firmly trust that the person you’re with is the person you are always going to be with, it makes sense to entangle them in every part of your life and become emotionally dependent. It’s what 20-somethings do and thank God for it. There’s no better feeling than feeling all the good and the bad so extremely. And eventually, you will have been through enough of these that you start protecting your heart a little more.
Worst: Your friends are so-all-up-in-your-business
As we get older, we have been through a greater variety of experiences and thus, tend to need to rely less on other people’s input when it comes to dealing with love’s little mysteries.
However, in our 20s, every situation is essentially a new one…and our friends are all too eager to throw in their two cents. Not that it isn’t helpful to have friends at your back, but when you have all kinds of people whispering advice for your intimate life in your ear and you don’t yet possess the skill to filter it all out and boil it down to what makes sense, it’s easy to let the whole thing get muddle. Friends can be great allies but they can also make navigating 20-something romance a much more complicated task than it needs to be.
Best: Endless energy
Staying out until 5AM with friends and then falling into bed for a bit of post-adolescent sex-ploration…and still waking up for your coffee shop job at 7? Yeah, that’s the glory of being young; you hardly need any sleep. You’ll never have this much time for falling in love and having unholy amounts of sex again.
Best: Un-attachment
All of these are assumptions but from my experience, your 20s means: no kids, no property ownership, no career that is so set that you’re inextricably tied to it…in short, you have the freedom to move around.
And when you’re in love, being able to float and travel and explore together makes for some of the greatest romance you’re likely to experience. Not that you can’t do that during other times in your life but the sad truth is, the older you get, the more baggage you accumulate. Being young, free of attachments and in a relationship is a pretty great thing.
Worst (and Best): You’ll be nostalgic for this time and these people forever
Okay, maybe this is a good thing: unlike high school, you’re way more likely to develop relationships (both friendly and romantic) in your 20-something years that will carry on into the rest of your life. But the ones that do fade away will probably be a point of carefree, passionate nostalgia for the rest of your life.
By Jessi_bee